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Grave Concerns.


Sixty-seven days ago I discovered the utility of making major life decisions in a cemetery.

Ripe ground for an epiphany, indeed.

Surrounded by people crammed into little boxes, I rapped on the walls of my own.

Itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny little boxes housing all I hold dear - my empire - lined up neatly like the soup cans in my grandma's pantry.

Until sixty-seven days ago, that is.

I suppose it doesn't much matter what particular transaction drove me to seek clarity on a wet and dirty path separating rows of people I've never met. The big stuff usually falls under love, money, sex or family, so take your pick.

But as for my epiphany? Well, here is the skinny: control is always, invariably - ultimately - just an illusion.

When my gal pals ask me for the fast track to an epiphany of their own, here is what I've got to say: while I was busily straightening boxes, a divine force descended and shook me awake. Then left me laying in its wake;

like a bloody nose that comes in the night.

There are only three things in this world I know for certain. One, nothing in this world is certain; Two, nice girls nurture but do not possess; and Three, if you sit in a graveyard surrounded by plots, you will learn how to live, outside of the box.

Lisa Groves is a recovering attorney, an author, yoga teacher, president of I've Been Meaning to Write, LLC, a Scottsdale-based marketing firm, and Madeline Mary's Mom. The above essay is excerpted from Lisa's book "Off the Beaten Path," (c) 2012, her most recent work of nonfiction and journey through abuse recovery. For orders, to view additional excerpts, or for a righteous vegan lemon bar recipe, contact Lisa at or visit

Disclaimer: The views presented in the Rehumanize Blog do not necessarily represent the views of all members, contributors, or donors. We exist to present a forum for discussion within the Consistent Life Ethic, to promote discourse and present an opportunity for peer review and dialogue.

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